Going off to smell my kids’ hair now…

Welcome to my first readers from India! It’s great to have you visit and I really hope that you enjoy and benefit from what you get to read here!

In my last post https://homeschoolingmiddleeast.wordpress.com/2012/03/29/week-6-day-36-of-homeschooling-in-the-middle-east-books-and-building/, I talked about feeling a bit lacking in time for myself and then a couple of hours later, I read this and thought it was absolutely charming, “Me time, by Cowabunga. The wonderful unschooling mom Schuyler Waynforth wrote this on an online unschooling discussion group to a mom who felt she needed more “me” time: “Sit still with them. And when they are still, sit still with yourself. Don’t use so many moments of the day to do anything. Find ways to eat more, to get more calories in, with two little ones I found I was letting myself get hungry and tired too often. Look for ways to connect with them. There are biological ways. Smelling their heads is amazingly connective. At 11 and 14 it still works for me, but when they still had that new baby smell, that mussy, sweaty, sleepy, milky head smell, it switched massive switches for me. Look at them. Watch them talk or move or bounce or roll or whatever it is they are doing and marvel at the fact that they are.

Sometimes it’s hard, just staying still, just watching, just being with babies. But it won’t be long–although if you are with them all that time, you get it to be longer than parents who don’t make those choices, or have the ability to make those choices–until 9 months is a year and 3 year is 4. Time passes, they grow and they change and they move on in their interests and abilities. And you get lots more time to yourself.

In the hard moments, in the moments when you feel like you’ve been around babies and toddlers for too long, stop thinking that. Literally, come up with something else to think about. Think about a bird that flew by the window, or the way the light plays in your child’s hair, or that noise that you can hear, where it could it be coming from? anything. Think about anything but frustration and get up and go make yourself a smoothie or maybe find a DVD to watch or do a mad dash around the house, upstairs, downstairs, in the bathroom and all the rooms with your giggling three year old along and your 9 month old in your arms and when you are done fall on the couch or the bed and feel better. Watch that moment pass into a different moment.” and then this was posted in reply, by Amanda “Thank you! I needed that. I know this constant need for my attention is important, that is part of the reason I keep them home, so they can get what they need emotionally. I know all too soon they will be going off to college or getting jobs, moving out. I will put your suggestions into practice. :)”

I concur and will be submitting my own thanks to Cowabunga! One of the big reasons for home educating my kids is that I so much love them being around all the time. For our family, it feels right. We love and learn together. I never felt completely right when Edward was at school, I knew the best place for him was home, of course not helped by the fact he was never happy at school. I was so lucky that I never had to suffer from Petra going away. We are different kinds of people. Most people don’t understand that. But I’m OK with that. I’m going to go and smell my kids’ hair now 😉

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About homeschoolingpenny

Hi and welcome! My name is Penny and I used to live in Bahrain but In November 2012 moved to Dubai and now we live in Granada, Spain! If you want to contact me my email is pjmontford@hotmail.com. I recommend you start my blog on 'Day 1' but please enjoy whatever you dip into. 23 February 2012 marked the first day of no more school FOREVER for my two kids. Edward, who is nearly 10 had attended a variety of schools since he was very little. Petra, who is now 6, has never gone to school. On this date we decided Edward was never going back to school and Petra never would go to school. We hope to successfully homeschool from this day forward, although we would consider an alternative school as an option- if there was some amazing Sudbury or other really alternative school. Actually, I prefer the term 'home learning' than 'homeschool' because I don't like to think of school coming into our home. In fact, I hope to go further and guide/learn alongside, rather than teach, my kids using the 'unschooling' philosophy to instill a lifelong love of learning in them. We lived in the Middle East and now Spain all of which are very challenging places to home educate. This is an exciting journey that I used to blog about regularly, at first it was on an almost daily basis. Please join me on our travels and I hope we might be able to help each other out along the way. I certainly hope I can be a source of support and comfort and, in time, knowledge to all potential/presently participating homeschoolers/home educators/unschoolers. Good luck to us all! If you want to read about why I started home educating, why I pulled my son out of a 'very good' private school mid-term, how I felt at the very start and how my philosophy has evolved, please start from 'Day 1' of the blog. Please do post comments at the end of any days that you read. Your opinion is valuable and it's great to start up debate amongst other people commenting too, however old the post. Thank you for visiting homeschoolingmiddleeast.
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2 Responses to Going off to smell my kids’ hair now…

  1. Penny, as if you’re speaking my mind and worries! I was thinking to pursue my MA studies in literature or translation when they grow old and go to school. Now, that I am highly thinking to homeschool, I fear I would be postponing my personal plans a bit further than expected. Do you think it will be possible to do that given that homeschooling is about creating a minute to minute chances for learning?
    You know, the best part I noticed in your article is when you say that you feel your kids’ place is at home. I love that!
    Best of luck

    • I don’t know, Imane. It’s a hard one to decide – how much to put off your own personal plans to homeschool. Lots of people I read about do some sort of work as well as homeschool. As the kids get older, they will get more independent so it will become easier to fit in other things, especially if it’s based from home, or you have other trusted family members to look after them. Since I don’t see homeschooling as a race, since I’m not aiming to get my kids ahead of their schooled counterparts, there is plenty of time to cover what they need to know over the years. I hope to do more writing for instance. Thanks for your comment. I’m sure lots of other readers are having the same worries. Best wishes!

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